Feb252026
Family Law Q&A Series

How do I establish my parental rights if the other parent and I were never married? – North Carolina

Short Answer

In North Carolina, an unmarried parent usually establishes enforceable parental rights by first establishing legal parentage (most often paternity) and then obtaining a custody order. Parentage can be established by a signed affidavit of parentage or by a civil paternity case in court, often using genetic testing. Once parentage is established, either parent can ask the court to decide custody and parenting time based on the child’s best interests.

Understanding the Problem

In North Carolina, when parents were never married, the key question is how a parent can be legally recognized as a parent with enforceable rights to custody and parenting time. The decision point is whether legal parentage has already been established or still needs to be established before a custody case can move forward. The goal is to move from an informal arrangement to a court-enforceable status that allows a parent to seek equal custody.

Apply the Law

Under North Carolina law, a child born outside of marriage can have paternity established either by a voluntary affidavit of parentage or through a civil action to establish paternity. A paternity judgment (or a properly executed affidavit of parentage in the right setting) creates a legal foundation for child support and custody to be decided. After paternity is established, the parents’ rights and responsibilities for custody and support are treated the same as if the child were born to married parents, and custody can be addressed in District Court.

Key Requirements

  • Legal parentage must be established: For an unmarried father (and in some cases other unmarried parents depending on the situation), the court generally needs a legal basis to recognize parentage before it can enter enforceable custody and support orders.
  • Proof must meet the required standard: In a civil paternity case, paternity must be proven by “clear, cogent, and convincing” evidence, and genetic testing is often the cleanest way to meet that burden in a contested case.
  • Custody is decided after parentage is established: Once paternity is established, either parent can ask the court to enter a custody order, and the court can set a schedule and decision-making authority.

What the Statutes Say

Analysis

Apply the Rule to the Facts: Here, the goal is to establish parental rights and pursue equal custody. In North Carolina, that typically means confirming whether legal parentage is already established (for example, by an affidavit of parentage or a prior court order). If parentage is not established or is disputed, a civil paternity case (often with genetic testing) can create the legal foundation needed to ask the court for a custody order that addresses equal parenting time.

Process & Timing

  1. Who files: Either parent (and in some situations a child support agency) can start a paternity case. Where: Typically District Court for a civil paternity action; a legitimation petition is filed as a special proceeding in Superior Court. What: A complaint to establish paternity (often with a request for genetic testing) and, once parentage is established, a custody complaint/motion. When: A civil action to establish paternity must be filed before the child turns 18.
  2. Testing and proof: If parentage is contested, the court can order genetic testing. In some contested cases (including when the case is filed more than three years after birth), North Carolina law requires genetic-marker evidence to establish paternity.
  3. Custody order: After parentage is established (by affidavit or judgment), the court can enter custody orders addressing legal custody (decision-making) and physical custody (parenting time). If the parents reach agreement, the court may be able to enter a consent order; if not, the court decides after hearing evidence.

Exceptions & Pitfalls

  • Signing an affidavit without full certainty: An affidavit of parentage can carry major legal consequences. The rescission window is limited, and later challenges generally require specific grounds (such as fraud/duress/mistake) plus genetic testing.
  • Waiting too long can raise proof hurdles: If paternity is contested and the case is filed more than three years after the child’s birth, genetic-marker evidence becomes critical under North Carolina law.
  • Paternity is not the same as custody: Establishing paternity is often the first step, not the last. A separate custody order is what typically creates an enforceable parenting schedule.
  • Choosing the wrong procedure: Legitimation and paternity are different processes with different courts and effects. Filing one action can affect what another court is allowed to do while the first case is pending.

For more on how courts approach equal parenting time once a case is properly filed, see how to get a court order for 50-50 custody.

Conclusion

In North Carolina, an unmarried parent generally establishes enforceable parental rights by establishing legal parentage first (often through an affidavit of parentage or a civil paternity action with genetic testing) and then seeking a custody order. A paternity case must be filed before the child turns 18, and once paternity is established, custody and parenting time can be decided like any other custody case. Next step: file a paternity action in District Court (if parentage is not already established) before the child’s 18th birthday.

Talk to a Family Law Attorney

If establishing parental rights is needed to pursue equal custody and a clear parenting schedule, our firm has experienced attorneys who can help explain the options, paperwork, and timelines under North Carolina law. Call us today at [CONTACT NUMBER].

Disclaimer: This article provides general information about North Carolina law based on the single question stated above. It is not legal advice for your specific situation and does not create an attorney-client relationship. Laws, procedures, and local practice can change and may vary by county. If you have a deadline, act promptly and speak with a licensed North Carolina attorney.

Category: Family Law Q&A Series

Author: Pierce Law

Pierce Law Group is a North Carolina law firm focused on probate administration, real estate partition matters, and surplus funds claims across North Carolina. We know these situations often come with stress, family dynamics, and time-sensitive decisions—so we prioritize clear communication, steady guidance, and a practical plan from day one. Our goal is to make a complicated process feel manageable, while protecting what matters most to you.